Under the Marriage Age 5 Years

Behind the age of 5 years of marriage. (Photo: Getty Images)

LIKE wade grief in the household for five years or more is certainly more "lively", is not it? Moreover, generally within a span of five years, Moms and Dads already have one or two pieces of liver.

While some say the age of marriage is vulnerable under the five years, not necessarily everything is safe, serene, tranquil if successful past five years.

According to Dr. Adriana S. Ginanjar, MS, Lecturer of Psychology Faculty University of Indonesia, there are a series of problems that often occur within five years of marriage, including adjustment problems and compatibility with each other, the increasing role demands (such as wife-mother-women who work), the culture in Indonesia which include a large family (metua, brother or sister in law and others), differences in customs, finance and management expectations, differences in expectations about marriage are communicated from the beginning.

The importance of cooperation
/> Admittedly, the initial five years of marriage will be found a variety of problems that originate from within the family.

This is natural. Because sometimes what is expected at the beginning of such a marriage after the honeymoon will be harmonious, happy to have small families, minimal conflict, and not as beautiful as any other reality. For that, it takes cooperation and mutual support in order to survive.

Avoid sensitive topics with a negative tone
/> Contrary opinion is familiar with the couple, live how you react to it. Try to understand the differences in male and female, ranging from the mindset, meaning money for husband / wife, the meaning of intimate relationships and so on.

Interpretation Moms and Dads need to be equated in order to avoid misunderstandings. Bijaklah in dealing with sensitive topics in the household. Suppose a husband and wife have a large income differences, avoid review of money!

In addition, other sensitive topics is a big family, intimate relationships, the role of motherhood aka wife who had more focus on children.

So important that you apply as a good listener without criticizing your partner, so he feels needed and appreciated.

Face, realistic and tolerant

When I was single, not a few women who have a 'dream' a beautiful wedding like a fairy tale or a domestic trip as smooth as marble. Hmmm, certainly not a wise thing to believe it!

In addition to bringing together all the different to unity, marriage, according to the culture in Indonesia, also brings together two great families. Of course th is is a challenge. So, see marriage is not the only source of happiness, may make us understand the reality and be ready to face it.

After all, harmony does not mean the family without a fight and not one word should always be in tune.
Most importantly, accept the differences from your partner and understand that indeed there are problems or differences that can not be resolved and must be accepted until whenever. This is the best form of tolerance.

Five tips remain harmonious:

1. Disclose the expectations you both concretely and openly. Discuss and adjust their respective roles. For example Dads very happy if every waking provided hot tea and sweet snacks, instead of heavy dishes like fried rice or chicken porridge.

2. Each pair can be changed. So, always take the time to get to know your partner and knowing what to change. For example, two years ago his wife was often worried about money bu t this year was able to set it up better. Build positive communication and are willing to listen to each other-not contain criticism-so that all issues can be discussed with each other is not dropping.

3. Quite realistically, not only demanding but give each other. Realistically that is understood there is a marriage of not only happiness but also met with conflict and must be completed. Discuss if there is desired or required, but do not forget to give a chance. Example, the husband wants his wife to not work after marriage, but gave the wife the opportunity to choose a school or tutoring your child.

4. The need honeymoon the second, third and so on. The presence of little to no excuse for Moms can not do it alone with Dads . No need to go abroad or outside the town, enjoying a day with her husband to watch a movie or eating a favorite food alone is enough.

5. If the problem still can not be resolved even though many have already done and discussed, it could not hurt to consult a psychologist. (Source: Mom & Kiddie)

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